Sleepy Hollow, Northern California. “What a perfect place for a writer to live,” I thought, when I moved here almost five years ago. And I did get a lot of writing done, when I wasn’t in my garden, that is.
Our house is surrounded by woods and high hills, with a seasonal creek dancing along the right edge of our property, lined by a sentinel of three giant rocks. “We’re butt up against nature here,” is what my husband likes to say.
When I saw it, apart from thinking about the quaint name of the area and of its street names, like “Van Winkle Drive,” and “Ichabod Lane,” I also imagined that I could, at long last, have a garden. Having lived all my life in small flats in a city or by the sea, I’d made do with potted flowers on my windowsills and balconies. Now I had almost a full acre of dirt to plant and I couldn’t wait to get started.
Testing the soil, mapping the sunny and shady areas of the ground, I bought containers and containers of colourful blooms and planted them with enthusiasm and care. I toiled in that garden daily, my nails turning jagged and brown as I dug in eggshells and coffee grinds to fertilize the earth, picked off caterpillars and crinkled dead stems from each plant, watered and weeded carefully and methodically. Week after week, month after month I worked, until my garden was rich and full and I could revel in the vibrancy of it.
Then the deer came. Dozens of them, grown and small, with antlers and without; they came down from the rise of trees behind our house. To someone who’d never seen them up close before, they looked splendid, graceful and gentle. A gift from nature, a blessing, even.
Until I woke up one morning and wandered out into my garden to discover it no longer existed. I could see only the remnants of it left by a savage marauder who thought every blossom, every leaf I’d lovingly attended, was nothing more than dinner salad. The deer had eaten their way through bougainvillea, geraniums, lobelia, impatiens, petunias, pansies, azalea bushes, rose bushes, and when nothing else was left, even ivy vines. I stood in horrified dismay looking down at the concrete and the grass where scattered specks of green, blue, red, pink, purple, and yellow, which had once been my beloved, beautiful flowers, lay strewn and still, as though they’d tried to run and escape from a terrible siege, but had perished in their efforts, anyway.
The deer became my enemy then, and my war with them was on. Armed with powdered blood meal, deer netting, and a foul smelling spray made of garlic and eggs, I attacked. They retreated for a while. Then I woke up one morning again to discover that during the night, the hungry deer had somehow managed to nibbled under the netting. They’d also concluded that both powdered blood meal and rotten egg/garlic spray made delightful salad dressings. My flowers were murdered a second time. Not only did this make me cry, it made me furious.
My husband could not understand my perspective. Growing up on a farm and living in rural areas all his life, he’d shared space with various wild animals since he’d been born. To him, the presence of deer in our garden had the same feeling about it you get when you shrug on an old coat. It wasn’t necessarily attractive, but it felt familiar and comfortable. But in just the way I splashed delightedly into the sea in Greece while he stood there shivering and thinking of sharks; or slid easily between passengers on a New York City subway while he thought of pickpockets, the deer were as alien to me as those experiences were to him. Somehow, he’d missed that.
“Why not just plant things they won’t eat?” he asked pragmatically, not even trying to hide his impatience with me.
“What, you mean lavender?” I replied, sardonically, not even trying to hide my annoyance with him.
To me, just having purple buds in the garden looked dull. Judging by the preponderance of lavender and oleander in the area, everyone else had surrendered to the deer. But I wouldn’t. I didn’t even like oleander, although the fact that it was poisonous and that the deer just might get hungry enough to eat it, was an entertaining thought by that time.
My focus on the deer and their activities in our garden became a bone of contention between my husband and me. Now I’d graduated to running outdoors whenever I saw one, to clap my hands at it and “shoo” it away, spraying them with the hose when I was out watering in my garden, hovering by the windows whenever I heard any suspicious rustling outside, and even throwing small pebbles at their feet so they’d flee. But though they’d scramble away, they’d only come back again when they knew I wasn’t looking. Those devils.
And when I’d complain that they’d managed to foil me again, my husband would say, “It’s not personal, dammit. Stop planting deer food and they won’t come.”
I despised the deer for not being discouraged by my efforts to thwart them, and I was hurt and irritated with my husband for not knowing what was at stake for me.
Then, two years ago, on Father’s Day, I was out in my garden and heard a strange bleating sound, just up the hill behind the house on the other side of the creek. As I began to walk across our lawn towards the creek to investigate, a doe stepped out from behind a tree on the hill where she’d been hiding, and looked down at me in a way I’d never seen a deer look. Her ears and head were actually bent foward in an aggressive position and she was staring directly at me. A head-on stare was an unusual pose for a deer, as they ordinarily looked out at me from the sides of their eyes. Not only that, but she was making a peculiar, snorting sound I’d never heard a deer make, either. It was as though she were growling a warning. I stopped still and looked up at her as the bleating continued, much closer this time. That’s when I realised: She was guarding her fawn. The cry I was hearing was the sound of her newborn. I stepped back and nodded. A mother looking out for her baby. Fair enough. I wasn’t about to chase them, that was for sure.
But as I stepped back, the doe did an odd thing. She began to sway on her feet. Then, in the most ungraceful way I’d ever seen a deer move, she seemed to stagger across the hill, directly across from where I stood on the lawn, and away from her baby. She stumbled dizzily, and then —God help me— her knees gave way and she collapsed. I gasped in shock as she began sliding down the hill towards me, unable to stop her fall. I knew any moment she would come tumbling over the retaining wall and onto the lawn where I stood.
It was a pile of logs gathered at the base of the fence that prevented her complete tumble over the wall. Now, as I watched in horror, she was lying on her side, thrashing, her legs tangled up in logs, desperately trying, but unable to get her footing back on the hill. After a few moments, she sank down and gave up. Laying her head back on the dirt she twisted around, and from her lying position, feebly but determinedly, she lifted her back head up and looked at me.
She wore that startled look one always sees on a deer. The look of prey that knows they are prey. You might think she was fearing for herself in her look, afraid of me, because she knew I’d always chased her kind away.
No. … There was something else… I felt something else in that look. It was the look of one mother to another. It went straight through my heart as surely as if she’d spoken to me. And, as though I were reading that mother’s look from my spirit instead of my brain, I looked back at her, too, directly into her eyes, and said, “Don’t worry. I’ll find your baby. I promise. And I promise she won’t be harmed.”
She held my look as though she were listening and understanding my words, my English words, which I’d said out loud to an animal, a wild creature that couldn’t speak. Then with one weak nod, she lay her head back one final time, looked up at the sky and… I saw her die. Hoping I was wrong in everything I was witnessing, I stayed to see if she might move. But as I stayed and watched her, those brown doe eyes slowly filmed over white. For sure, she was gone.
I turned and ran into the house, calling for my husband. He was on the phone with Tim, one of our sons, who’d called to wish him a “Happy Father’s Day.” He asked Tim to hold on a moment as he listened to my agitated words. Then he said into the phone, “Tim, I’ll have to let you go. We’ve got another deer emergency.”
And with that smart aleck remark, my husband followed me as I pointed out to where the doe lay, and then to where I knew I’d heard her fawn.
That remark to our son about ‘another’ deer emergency hadn’t done it, but what he said next did. “She’s not dead. She’s probably just resting. And I’m fairly certain there is no fawn.”
I turned on him. “I may not have been raised on a farm, but I’m not an idiot, “I snapped. “That deer is as dead as you can get, and her fawn is over there, on the other side of our creek.”
He could tell I meant business then, so with sigh, he climbed up over the retaining wall and gingerly approached that poor doe. Peering at her, he confirmed what I knew. “Yeah. She’s gone, alright.” Then standing he turned to me and asked, “Where did you hear the fawn?” When I pointed in the direction again, he said, “We’ll have to approach very quietly, or we might scare it.”
I followed him across the creek. I couldn’t see anything, but a moment later, he lifted his arm and whispered, “there.”
Sure enough, sitting comfortably in a bed of leaves, her front legs crossed, looking directly at us, with curiosity and no fear whatsoever, was the tiniest fawn I’d ever seen.
My husband’s tone was very different now. “Listen, if that doe died after giving birth, she probably was too old or too sick to survive it. That might mean she wasn’t able to feed this little thing, either. And that’s not good. If Animal Services can’t get any milk into her, she won’t make it.”
I was beside myself at those words. I’d made a promise and I was already trying to figure out, if my husband’s verdict were true, how I, a woman who’d spent the last three years chasing deer from her garden, was going to save this one.
Animal Services estimation was not so bleak, however. It took two of their vans to our home — one for the live animal and one for the dead — but they determined that the fawn would survive. She’d been fed one last time by her mother, and in fact still had a belly full of milk. She’d be cared for, then released when she was able to survive on her own. She’d probably live to eat my flowers another day.
As for her mother, I watched the man from Animal Services gently close her eyes. Then he and my husband wrapped her in a sheet and carried her down the hill into the back of the second waiting transport van. I watched as it drove away.
I am not a Hindu. But, the Anahata is the fourth primary chakra according to Hindi Yogic and Tantric traditions. It symbolises the consciousness of love, empathy, selflessness and devotion. On the psychic level, this centre of force inspires the human being to love, be compassionate, altruistic, devoted and to accept the things that happen in a divine way.
And wouldn’t you know it? The animal it is represented by is the deer.
I am not a Hindu, I’ll say again. But I know what I felt and I know what I experienced. That mother doe and I communicated that day. And by our bond of motherhood, we became more than two different species on opposites sides of an issue. We became more than predator and prey. With her dying breath, she looked at me, her enemy, and saw something in me that was like her. She knew she could ask me for help with the one thing left for her here to take care of, her one last, most precious thing.
I didn’t let her down.
My garden is very different now. I keep one giant pot of red geraniums up high on a porch where no animals can reach, as a reminder that beauty can never excuse arrogance. Now my yard is flooded with lavender.
And you know, it smells wonderful. What’s even more wonderful is seeing the deer there. We’re at peace with each other now.
I wish it were that easy to make peace within our species.
Note: This essay was published in Marin Magazine’s November 2010 issue
This is great and totally went in a direction I didn't expect. A lovely story that reinforces the truth of the interconnectivity of all living things. Thanks for sharing it, Patricia.Sadly, the reason we can't do this as well inside our own species is because there are those who would as soon call you crazy as be touched by your experience. Some are just too "smart" for their own good.Say, isn't Lavender a Greek flower? Should make you feel at home, shouldn't it? I love that you keep a pot of geraniums up high, away from nibbling mouths. It seems to me like a better victory than keeping the deer away entirely. Good for you.
You know what would work, motion sensor tied into an automatic sprinkler system. Much better than salad dressing I suspect. Your stories are always so pretty with such a unique perspective.
Oh sure, squish out all the heartless comments I was going to make about venison (something which my freezer is full of). That's a wonderful story. And I do believe that doe spoke to you. I am of the opinion that anyone who thinks we are the only species capable of higher level thinking or communication is nuts.
This is such a wonderful story. Although my critter enemy of choice is a city dweller, the gray squirrel, we have an equally complicated relationship. They destroyed my bird feeders, until I broke down and bought $90 squirrel-proof Duncraft feeders. Problem solved. Then they started tipping over my bird bath every day. Every single day. They destroyed my flower beds digging them up and burying their treasures. They tipped over my potted herb garden in the back yard and decimated it last year. They actually uprooted and carelessly tossed aside the fragile hostas I planted last year to plant their own stash. And despite all of that, even though I know I could let my dog catch them in the back yard and kill them, I just can't. I always jiggle the handle of the back door in warning, and let them scamper away before I let the dog out there. I'm not even really sure why I do it.You're so, so right. If only humans could learn to compromise and coexist peacefully. If only.
Beautiful story. I love deer and I know they are in my yard—I just never manage to see them. I should plant some stuff I know they'd like just for the joy of seeing them. Except with my luck they'd only come at night when I was asleep. ~sigh~
I have 'possums and a feral cat that come up on the front porch and eat my cat's food. OC growls and hisses at the feral cat, but lets the 'possums eat all they want. Weird cat.
Nice one to come back to, Patricia. I think we could all learn something from our fellow creatures on this earth, if we looked around us a little more.
[You are wonderful]There is nothing greater in life than a knowing bond with another animal or person. There is no sport, no drug, no amusement ride, no other experience that can truly affect one's being in a more profound way. As a species it is truly sad that we are so disconnected from each other. I like the idea of Anahata, it reminded me of of the African term Abataka, which means "family, community, belonging." It's pronounced Abba-t'ka if anyone is curious. I believe as a species, in our communities, in our social groups, in our families and between each other and other animals, that if we could bond in the same fashion you did with that doe, we might be a lot better off.We might appreciate life more, and commodities less.
I am amazed by this story. It's so cool on so many levels. I would love to live right by the mountains like you do. And what an experience that was! We can all learn so much from animals. Thank you for sharing!
such a beautiful post. made me weepy, but in a good way.
gosh. what a wonderful post. the story was touching, as usual… i missed your posts.. you must be so busy these days… which is a good thing, right? 🙂
What a fantastic post. You had me on the edge of my seat. Thank you, Patricia.
Thanks for sharing this wonderful story, P. I think we humans have a lot more to learn about life and death, and about ourselves and the world around us. It's a lot bigger and more complex than we dare to imagine. In one moment of eye contact with the doe, you probably learned a lot more about life in years of living. Terrific stuff. Enjoy your beautiful garden.
Beautiful! Have you ever heard of animal totems?? Sometimes when we need to learn a lesson we will (If you believe this sort of thing) be visited by an animal that represents the lesson we need to learn…Maybe that is what this deer was sent to show you. I looked up Deer totems and found this…
Deer is a keen observer, enabled to see well in low lighting and its sensitive hearing allows it to perceive a twig snap in the distance. For the first few days of life a fawn hardly moves, hidden by the color of its coat from predators. Once it can stand, it follows its mother around to learn how to survive. The graceful movement and gentle nature of these creatures show us the innocence of nature.
Deer is a messenger of serenity, can see between shadows and hear what isn't being said.
Deer teaches us to maintain our innocence and gentleness so we can share our open-heartedness with others.
Beautiful story!
I LOVE Deer!…But I have a black thumb! LOL
Great story. Living so close to nature brings a respect and admiration for all gods creatures.
I'm from Northern California, Bay Area., 4th generation. But I lived in the burbs and we didn't have any deer issues. Then we move out to the desert and boy was that a shock. We have deer, javalina, squirels, rats, badgers, fox, bob cats, cutter ants and even a cutter bee. Ove the last 14 years I've feed them many a flower, tomato, squash and rose bush. Now to protect my roses I have to cage them in chicken wire to keep them alive.
This year I trying to grow tomatoes, I have them in buckest in an aviry to keep them safe. I've planted red sage, cactus, rosemerry, texas ranger (sage) and desert spoon. They seem to survive the locals so far.
Oh I really like you banner, it is stunning.
"Sadly, the reason we can't do this as well inside our own species is because there are those who would as soon call you crazy as be touched by your experience. Some are just too "smart" for their own good."
I know exactly what you mean. I also think it's a matter of incredulity, or religious convictions, or any other number of limited thinkings.
I didn't know lavender was a Greek flower. Good to know.
Thanks for your comments, Kirk.
Hi, Tony,
We have three motion sprinklers and they do work for the most part, until the deer get so hungry they're willing to put up with the water spray. One thing the sprinklers do help for sure are the wild turkey. They hate it and haven't come into the yard since we put thesprinklers out. Turkey are much more trouble than deer re: droppings. Yuck.
Thank you for your comments about my stories. As I admire your work, it's very nice to know you like mine, too. : )
Oh sure, squish out all the heartless comments I was going to make about venison (something which my freezer is full of).
LOL. One of my sons really enjoys venison. I've only had it once and it is tasty. I do agree that animals can communicate, but becoming a vegetarian is not in my plans right now. Having said that, shooting at the deer in my yard, with any other than a B-B gun is probably also out of my range of thinking, too. The problem here is that the deer are never culled as hunting has been outlawed. I wouldn't be surprised if that poor mama starved to death. There are far too many deer here now, which explains why they graze through gardens like locusts…..
Wow. We have squirrels, and maybe I should be blaming them for some of the devastation. I had no idea they could even tip a bird bath! A friend of mine bought humane squirrel traps.She would capture then, because they'd invaded her mother's attic, and then release them in a nearby park. I don't think a dog can catch them that easily, but it's presence would certainly keep them away. How are you feeling, by the way? I've had a busy two weeks, and am planning to catch up with my neighbourhood on Saturday. How long is it now? In case I get busy when it happens, please be sure to send an announcement, if you can. : )
How strange that your story has brought me to tears, the tears are because of the mother passing but also because that we have lost this in ourselves, the ability to look at our enemy or what we think is our enemy and see ourselves, people, animals that just want what we do.Thanks for reminding me again that my life is no more important then another's.
beautiful post with message that i could apply to myself. things we learn reading from others…lol.
Thank you. and I do belive that there can be something, some comunication in the way you describe. I Have also linked to your post as it ended up forming part of something about change for me: somehow today I keep being reminded of stories of change, preferences and ideals as well as choices.
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More than on one occasion I feel more connected to an animal than I ever have to one of my own species.Great post and story. I love animal stories. I was born and raised Hindu (still am, somewhat) and I wish people would draw more inspiration from tenets like these than from spurious scriptures that propagate casteism, oppression of women and other such ridiculous things.
I wonder if OC is afraid of the possums, but recognises the cat as another cat.Animals certainly do think differently thanpeople. Except sometimes, like that day….Oh – I heard if you plant clover, deer will come, Don't know if it's true, but that's what I read…
A big welcome back, Snowy! You've been missed. I hope you enjoyed your trip. Funnily enough, I thought of you as I wrote this post, because it is something you've mentioned over and over again in your writings.
Tahnk you , Michelle. As usual, you express yourself so eloquently. I wonder if there is some kind of historical connection between the words, 'anahata' and 'abataka.' They sound too similar and their meanings too similar for it to be just a coincidence, don't you think? I will definitely explore this and check out the song you mentioned, too.
I see you changed your profle photo. Well, one day, you will just have to come out here and see the mountains for yourself! My little deer friends will be waiting for you! ; )
I'm glad you liked it, Patty. I know what you mean about weepy. It was very sad to see that doe being carted out like that. She tried to protect her fawn with her last dying breath. (Sigh)
Hi grrrace!
Got your email and can't wait to check out your posts. Yes, I have been busy, but it is a good thing, as you said. My book is finally being published!!! It should be out in a few more months, likely September or at the latest, October. The publicists are going to make an announcement about it soon. It's been very busy collaborating on the cover design and last minute changes, etc. I am so excited, though, I can't wait! My first book! It only took me almost four years. LOL
Hi, Emu! How wonderful that you replaced your profile photo with this beautiful photograph. What a lovely girl, with such an engaging smile and bright, enthusiastic eyes. Thank you for coming by and leaving me this comment, I'm glad you enjoyed the post. : )
Hello, Ninja:
I love this statement: It's a lot bigger and more complex than we dare to imagine.
The word 'dare' is so accurate. Even though life itself is such a miracle, no one can imagine other miracles might be right under our noses. Even people's concept of a God is not daring enough.
Thank you for this perspective. You never fail to make me think and imagine.
This is the coolest thing! Thank you for looking this up. I'll have to find out more about animal totems, they make so much sense. I know the deer seemed to come along right when my life was in the most turmoil. So perhaps you're right and there's some significance.
By the way, I just saw your photograph with your sons. I loved it. They are adorable and you just look terrific. I think you should keep at the photography, too. It might not be paying the bills, yet, as you stated in your profile, but I have a feeling you're in for a surprise someday in the not too distant future…..
Hehe, yeah, I thought it was time for a change. And when you say I'll have to come see the mountains, you mean your mountains, right? I do get to see mine everyday. Not as thoroughly as I'd like, but that's life. I hope there are a few more deer and some wabbits when I drop by 😉 You can be like Snow White!
Wow. I give you a lot of credit. You are much more tenacious than I. I would love to have tomatoes and roses, but I no longer have the time (or the energy) to look after things as I used to. I now have whatever limited things I can grow up out of reach of the animals. We also have a ton of pests, here, too. I opened the cupboard the other day and there was a scorpion! Luckily, one of my sons was with me and he routed it.
I haven't tried red sage in my garden. That would make a nice change. I do have rosemary and cactus, but the succulent ones were also eaten by the racoons. (sigh)
Re: the banner. This is a painting of a goddess in the three stages of her life. It is by Thalia Took and I really recommend you have stroll over at her website. She has the most beautiful things.
Thanks for coming by…. : )
" the ability to look at our enemy or what we think is our enemy and see ourselves, people, animals that just want what we do."
This is really a marvelous thought. I am truly so lucky to have such amazing neighbours. Thank you…..
I agree. I've always thought reading was the best way to learn, not only about others, but about ourselves, as you say. Thank you for your comment. It's very much appreciated….
Yes, thank you for the link. I read your post on the summer solstice. A brilliant sequeway to change, I thought. The part about one small act making a difference, does tie in nicely. After I read what you wrote, I thought of all the ways one small thing can make a big difference. Thank you for your comments.
The problem here is that the deer are never culled as hunting has been outlawed. I wouldn't be surprised if that poor mama starved to death. There are far too many deer here now, which explains why they graze through gardens like locusts….. Over population is a problem here in Oklahoma as well, but we do have hunting. A couple of years ago they even raised the limit. Each hunter can bag up to 7 deer in a season. My husband tries to put three in our freezer each year and then stops hunting unless he has a friend or relative lined up to take the meat from any more that he shoots. He never hunts strictly for the sport of it (even though that is his #1 reason for doing it). We also use all of the meat from the animals he kills. Most of his friends only take the choicest cuts and then leave the rest for the scavengers. We're working on teaching them how to cook the other parts so they will keep all the meat. While starvation is a problem with over population you must also account for the fact that deer are opportunistic eaters. Your garden is far tastier and easier picking that what they find in the forest. To them, your garden is a trip to the all you can eat buffet. Well, it would be all you can eat if it grew faster! 8:-)
LOL! Yes, I do mean 'my' mountains. Your comment about 'Snow White' reminds me of the film , Enchanted, where the fairytale princess, now living in New York, calls to the animals in song to help her clean (ala Snow White) and rats and cockroaches show up. I can just imagine myself out there, in a pretty princess dress, singing, trying to shoo away all kinds of nasty little creatures. ; )
Haha! That's amusing. I've seen that movie once. It was cute
although I draw the line at mosquitoes, personally.
Amen to that! I'm convinced mosquitoes and fleas (anything in fact that bites me and makes me itch) is a demon from hell. They get no sympathy from me. None.
"Gull-hate." Interesting term. Here, at outdoor cafes, when gulls sweep down at people, trying to grab at our food, we spray them from water bottles. It keeps them wary and it's a side entertaiment to the food and the view! ; )
Thank you for stopping by.
!!!!how exciting! 🙂 i'm so happy for you! 🙂 i want my copy autographed! 😛 hehe.
I wish people would draw more inspiration from tenets like these than from spurious scriptures that propagate casteism, oppression of women and other such ridiculous things.
I can really relate to this statement. The frustration of seeing the beauty in so many religions, only for them to become tainted by dogma that I am sure was added on much later by what was likely the devil himself, who figured out a way to use religions for his own purposes. It's such a paradox that so many belief systems have such inspiring tenents and the get bogged down in "ridiculous" stuff like you mention here.
Thanks for leaving this comment. It was terrific.
Your husband sounds like he knows the true definition of hunting. And you're right that the deer simply 'like' to eat in my garden, rather than 'must.' However, i live in a very liberal state and sometimes, as with any other perspective, that can be shortsighted. There is no hunting allowed anywhere. In the 70's, a larger species of deer was myopically introduced (when there was hunting and the hunters wanted a variety, if you can imagine that)) Now the larger species is dominating the smaller native species,which only adds to the problem. There is a beautiful natural park, Point Reyes, that has almost been destroyed by deer. Sooner or later this problem will have to be addressed.
Wow. What a nice thing to say, grrrace. Thanks. I know Jane (my publicist) is working on doing a book tour at major independent bookstores in California before we branch out to other states. I wanted to go independent because I like to support the smaller businesses (and also because I used to be an independent bookseller myself.) I know there are some in your county and when I find out where and when we're going, then we could meet and I'll take you out to lunch. I would love to meet you in person.
"I didn't know lavender was a Greek flower. Good to know." Well, I was actually asking you. I thought I'd learned that at some point. But I could be totally wrong. I'll have to look at Wiki now to be sure. 🙂
that would be so cool! i reeeeeally would love to meet you in person, too! 🙂 but shouldn't i be taking YOU out to lunch? hehe 🙂
I know they have lavender fields in Provence, that they are famous for. Does that make the bushFrench? Okay- we've go to research it now, for sure.
Nope- I have to treat YOU. As I just spent half an hour writing on your post, you write for my magazine. That makes me the person who has to pay for your lunch. I can write it off as a business expense. Hee hee. You can bring Mia, too. She doesn't write for the mag, but we used her photo, so she gets lunch, too. ; )
There is a beautiful natural park, Point Reyes, that has almost been destroyed by deer. Sooner or later this problem will have to be addressed. Let's hope it's sooner.
you wouldn't mind if i brought my naughty toddler??? hehe.
We'll just have to go to a two-star restaurant, instead of a four. thsi why if one of the three of us 'naughties' misbehaves, no one will notice. ; )
hehehe… absolutely. i'm not classy enough to eat at a 4 star, anyway 😛 tee hee!
I really thought they did a good job with it, considering it was just a fairytale for adults. My favourite was Susan Sarandon as the witch.
i'm not classy enough to eat at a 4 star, anyway
Neither is that ignorant lawyer, but I bet he goes to them all the time, the pig.
Let's hope it's sooner
I couldn't agree with you more. Despite the fact that we've 'made peace,' they are becoming hazardous because they are out of balance here.
i know. and i'll bet he feels like he deserves to eat there. *rolls eyes* he was SUCH a jerk.
Sometimes these high payed jackasses have trophy wives who do nothing but get their legs waxed and their boobs lifted up to their necks.. Maybe that's who he was confusing you with- his own bimbo, stay-at-home-and-do-nothing-but-give-other-women-a-bad-name wife.
good point… :)i always love your perspective on things 🙂
=) The animation was slightly disappointing after all the good ones that Disney has turned out in the past. It hasn't been up to par since….I dunno…Lilo and Stitch or The Emperor's New Groove
Oh I find scorpions in the house also. We have tranculas too but they are outside and very shy. I have great hope for the tomoatoes. I killed 3 plants earlier by over feterlizing them. I have a couple that will be ready to pick tomorrow morning. They are very small but I will enjoy having some real tomatoes as the ones in the stores have no taste.
The sage is a small bush and I've bought it at nurseries, ACE hardware and Home Depot.
I love fresh grown tomatoes.My neighbour has a fence around her yard to keep out the deer, so she grows heirloom tomatoes. Lucky for me, she brings me some and they are the best thing ever. Yum.
I will look for the sage. Thanks. : )
Oh, wow. Brought tears to my eyes. Thank you for this story.I can relate to everything you wrote from the deer eating my flowers to trying to find something to keep them away to saving a life. Two years ago a very small, very skinny doe was coming into my yard and feeding on the birdseed that had fallen to the ground. She was so skinny that I was afraid she was going to die and started leaving out extra seed for her. Then I began watching for her (she came at roughly the same time each evening) and going out to put seed out just for her. It evolved until I could get within ten feet of her and sit with her while she ate. Well, the payoff came a few weeks later when she began bringing her TWIN FAWNS to the yard to feed. It was the most amazing experience. I am convinced she knew I was helping her and trusted me enough to show me her babies. It still makes me warn and fuzzy.
The fawns are beautiful. You live in Virginia, I believe. I wonder where the deer go in winter. I've always wondered how they keep warm. BTW- Where did you get the banner of the painted cows? Did you do it yourself? I really liked it….
Thanks for stopping by. : )
I do live in Virginia, right on the edge of the George Washington National Forest and just a few miles from the Shenandoah National park. Lots of forest areas. I have a bear that also comes through periodically to tear down my feeders and eat the seed. Last time was about 3 weeks ago.I got the banner from the Vox Banners group. Lots on there to choose from. You can also steal it from my photos if you'd like. It should be tagged "banner".
How sweet of you to offer me your banner. Thanks. : )
I have to say, it sounds beautiful where you live. Not too sure about the bears, mind, but as long as it's just seed they're after….I expect you try to take as many photos as possible. I keep meaning to take a snap of the deer and the fawns, but I never have a camera handy when they pop up. So for now, I'll just look out at them from my office window….
Thanks very much, Patricia. 🙂
You are lucky, my neighbors don't grow tomatoes.
Your home sounds beautiful, I've only lived in cities and I dream of a place like that too. I'm glad you made your peace with the deer although it's a shame it took such a sad event to make it possible. I know how annoying it is to have something eat your precious flowers, I spent hours creating a little oasis in pots in my back garden, it all came into flower and looked stunning. I went on holiday for ten days, came back – the bastard slugs had eaten the lot, everything, complete decimation. Now I realise that they are just another species doing what they can to survive but that realisation did nothing to curb my desire to use a 12 bore to reduce the slug population in the garden. Unfortunately in Britain, if you discharge a 12 bore in an inner city garden an armed SWAT team arrives within moments. And I don't have a firearm anyway. But it is monumentally annoying to see all your hard work destroyed to provide lunch for wildlife.
I can relate to this story in a big way, believe me. As pretty as it is here, we've had all sorts of nasty beasts, who really do feel they have as much of a right to be inhabiting this piece of earth as I do. I didn't mention the flea and tick population that come along with the deer, and those can be dangerous. Little girl down the road came up with Lyme disease. Awful.
There are a few ways to counteract slugs. If you have pots with a copper ring on the inside, slugs won't go in. There are also slug pellets. You put them int eh soil and the slugs will eat them and shrivel up. Gross, but very effective.
Once again, I was intrigued by your story and your metaphor. It was a pleasure to read, though the horror I knew was about to unfold was the very reason I could never see the movie Bambi :)Thank you for the piece and perspective.I have to say, I went to Harlot's Sauce (not sure if name is correct here) and listened to podcast. This was of the wonderful interview with the woman from CA with brain disease and the love story and story of her courage. I didn't see a place to comment. And I was rushing after listening. So I take the moment to tell you how much I loved listening to her. She is an extraordinary woman of strength and inspiration. Please let her know she has touched people.I must have forgotten to add you to my neighborhood the first time I accidentally read your blog. Again, I accidentally read your blog post. Serendipity strikes twice :)Have a great day/night.
Thank you so much for this comment, Beanie. It's one of the nicest I've ever received. I'm happy I'm in your neighbourhood now. Welcome to mine. Amber will so appreciate your comments about her podcast. Her goal was to encourage and inspire and I can see she achieved that with you. I will pass on your comments, for sure. : )
Thanks for what you said here and at my place. I just scrolled up. Sometimes ya just want to get into the convo – the lawyer pig? I chuckled at the exchange. I hope to hear about your book. Make sure to notify us by putting an alert out when it's out :))
It was moving to read you get so involved in the 2008 pres election and express the terrible importance of it, in such a non-partisan way. That's what we need- more 'stick-togetherness'
: ) The lawyer exchange was because he was demeaning stay-at-home mothers. grrrace wrote a post about it. So many women got in on that. I have to admit- it was infuriating what he implied.
Your wishes about my book are much appreciated. I've published short works, but this is my first full-length work, so it's a big deal for me. Thanks.
This is actually pretty amazing. Though, for a moment, I was wondering if you kept the fawn as a pet!
My sister has lots of deer in her neighborhood and is constantly fighting to keep her garden from them, as well. I've sent her this post to remind her that we can coexist with the deer. (Besides, they were there first.)
And I will agree that the bond of motherhood is amazing. There's a certain kinship I feel toward other mothers that, well, women without children just don't understand. Having just lost my own mother earlier this year, I also find myself more protective than ever of my little boy.
I can't help but think it was fortuitous that you were in your garden that day and were there to, well, ultimately help that tiny fawn. Clearly, the child wouldn't have survived without your assistance that day.
Eileen, thank you for stopping by and leaving this thoughtful comment. I'm sorry to hear about the loss of you rmother. It's very hard, isn't it? How old is your little boy?
I am usually out in my garden almost everyday, if I can. However, I think the universe was trying to send me a message, for sure. I still continue to chase deer off, when they get too close the house.Unfortunately I have to because they bring fleas and ticks in. Even so, we're managing together a lot better than we used to.
: )
This story brought tears to my eyes for so many reasons but the integration of the Anahata chakra – well that was just perfect!
Thanks, LY. You know, I hope that I can adopt this integral way of viewing events. I think anyone who can do that has an advantage. It's still a work in progress for me. Sometimes I achieve it, other times, events smack me in the face as being so hard to take…..
I believe the integration takes us back to how things were done in ancient times – ancients of all different polytheistic cultures believed that everything in the Universe (like foods and animals and colors and stones, etc…) belonged to a deity so every day events could be studied in detail as a message from the Gods! Another interesting correlation is that the Native Americans also believed that the Deer represented the heart of Great Spirit – interesting how it would match up cross cultures!
Does it represent the heart of the Great Spirit? That is interesting. And it's true that we're receiving messages all the time, if we'd only listen for them.
Anyway,I hope you're doing well. It sounds like you are enjoying life in Florida, at least.
Thank you – I am enjoying my space and quietly hatching plans to get out of Florida – even over to the West coast of Florida 🙂 … but it works for the moment!
Take your time. You've been through so many changes, thought it seems you've come away in one piece. Good for you. : )
Thanks! sometimes I do feel like I am running towards…something…but, that is the dragonfly message again – stop, enjoy some tea and take a nice quiet look at what is going on around you!virtually, one piece – I have super glue for the others! LOL
virtually, one piece – I have super glue for the others! LOL
I hear you my friend. You'll get there. It just takes time…
Time I have…Thank you!
I'd like you to know I think you're very brave….for going and for coming back, both.
Thank you – from you, that means alot! It has not been easy but I am trying to stay positive. I keep telling everyone that I feel reincarnated – I am back where I started 3 years ago LOL so must be something I need to do here!
I am a Hindu and your post takes on even greater poignancy for me because of that 🙂 I have nothing to say except I loved this, and we always find ourselves in the place we need to be. Super post.
Thanks, LC. I'm sorry it took so long to answer this comment. I'd missed it somehow.
I also took a hiatus in July and am now catching up on your postings. As usual, I found something that touched me… Your line " I wish it were that easy to make peace within our species." And, yet, it wasn't easy to make peace between you and the dear until one thing happened… You looked into each other's hearts with love and trust, honesty and humility, mercy and justice …
Peace only comes to those willing to be open to all of these things. From working as an aid worker in Croatia to feeling the pain in my parents hearts over decisions made by my siblings, I've come to realize that unless all of these precious elements are there and fully present in both parties, true peace can not exist.
My roses live on my deck. The plums from halfway up the plum tree are mine, the plums from halfway down belong to "Plum". The apples from halfway up the apple tree belong to me, the apples from halfway down the apple tree belong to "Apple", the mother of "Plum." Apple had a new baby this year… I've decided to name our place "Deer Haven". (They don't touch my lilacs…)
This is a lovely comment. It comes at the perfect time, because the deer are on the attack again here. We've planted new grass and the despite our motion sprinkler, they decided it belongs to them. It's frustrating to see all the grass pulled up in the a.m, but I have probably completely conceded to the deer. There is a young buck who comes now and sits right outside my office window, behind the retaining wall fence, for example and I know he is probably one of the grass-eating culprits. Yet, do I chase him off? No, I just can't do it anymore. I watch him watch me and enjoy his beauty as I write. Maybe it's worth a ragged lawn.
Croatia, yes? What an interesting background you have. Enjoy your lilacs. They are a gift from your deer for the apples and plums, it seems.