Happy New Year, Everyone! Today I have some significant news to share.
On December 17, 2009, in the very early hours of the morning, I nearly bled to death. I’m afraid I’m serious ─ by the time I was admitted into hospital from the emergency room, I was down to about a quarter of the amount of blood needed to sustain life.
The irony of this situation is that I was under a doctor’s care at the time, and that’s one of the reasons that I’m going public with this today. The second reason is because since I have been off Facebook, my blogs, and other social networking sites, I’ve been getting emails from ‘fans’ asking questions such as: “Are you in rehab? You can tell me! My brother was in rehab last year at this time.” and “Did you have Demi-Moore-head-to-toe-plastic-surgery? Please post pics!”
I was inclined to let these strangers think what they would, but I’ve also been receiving messages of genuine concern, and those are why I’ve decided to write about this very personal experience publicly.
As boring as this probably makes me, a drug habit and/or a craving to own gravity-defying boobies had nothing to do with my absence from the internet. What actually happened was that on November 9, I had what should have been routine uterine fibroid surgery. I wanted to keep the knowledge of that fact limited to my family and closer circle of friends, because to me there is nothing more cringe-worthy than people announcing these things on their Facebook status updates: Jack is …”getting out of jail this week!” Jane…”’s a husband is a lousy cheat!” Patricia…”had a fibroid the size of a baseball removed from her uterus.”
Yuck.
So, I didn’t announce it, (until now) and only made vague references to “not feeling well”, and even those mentions were only because I’d missed some social and business events. However, the “not feeling well” stretched on and on, and when I questioned my doctor, he went from voicing some concern to being brusquely irritated, “You must be patient. You’re not a patient person.”
And that’s where he got me. I’ve heard that more than once. Even my own husband seconded it. So, I tried to be patient. And, as it turns out, I can be patient. Actually, I was so patient, I nearly died of it.
I’m sorry, I still squeamish about writing the specifics, but suffice it to say that I was bleeding, but in such an unusual pattern that it didn’t raise any alarm bells with the doctor. To be fair to him, the symptoms were atypical. Coupled with this detail was my enormous energy level that was only somewhat depleted by the anemia that was increasing weekly. In fact, the day before I was driven to the Emergency Room by my panicked husband, I attended a business meeting, then went to the market, and ended the day with a walk on the treadmill at my gym!
So, I can’t completely blame the doctor and others around me for missing the signs. But I do blame myself. For the reason that I knew something was wrong, and yet, I allowed myself to be talked out of that gut feeling, because an authority figure’s opinion on that was different than mine. I allowed my criticism of myself for my renowned lack of patience to cow me into accepting advice I knew I shouldn’t have accepted.
This really galls me. In the aftermath of a surgery from which I was not even remotely recovered after six weeks, followed by near-death in which I could literally feel ‘things shutting down’ on the way to the ER, a frantic blood transfusion of six units of blood, a second surgery to correct the problem that was causing the internal bleeding, and a stay in hospital that was like a Saturday Night Live skit (they actually woke me up at 2 a.m. after this ordeal to weigh me), and now looking at another few weeks before I’m able to resume all my normal activities, that one fact that I conceded precedence is what still disturbs me most about this experience. Because if I hadn’t, if I’d trusted myself, none of it would’ve occurred.
Usually, I am confident, capable, and secure in myself. In my writings, especially my political ones, I’m constantly stating how we must all think for ourselves, not cling to an ideology or allow some rhetorical speaker to do our thinking for us. And yet, it took this illness to discover that on some levels, I am still trying to be that ‘good little girl’ who is liked by everyone. Given the right circumstances, press the right buttons, and I will still defer to the instincts of others rather than my own. This was a more shocking realization than the ER doc’s words, “Wow– your blood counts are dangerously low. Lucky for you, you’re so fit. You wouldn’t have made it here otherwise.”
And now, because I’ve been so sick for so long (close to two months, now) I have to work twice as hard just to get back to that fitness level I worked so hard to attain in the first place. I also left the hospital with a cough that makes me sound like a TB victim, due to the second surgery temporarily diminishing my lungs capacity, and am short of breath just walking up a flight of stairs. I have to drink a horrid iron potion that tastes like rotted prunes and old coffee grinds. My skin feels like sandpaper, and I have been warned by my hairdresser that some of my hair might fall out due to the trauma. Pitiful, right? You bet. And stupid, too.
But I did learn some lessons, and oh, boy ─ they were big ones. And I think they might be important enough to share:
First is that this year has been an amazing year for me, and not just because it was almost my last one. I didn’t know when I first published my book that there would be a number of people who’d dislike me as a result. Never thought of that aspect of it, but there it was. So that was a lesson, if not learned for the first time, reiterated: Your true friends are the ones who stick with you not only when times are bad, but also when times for you are really, really good. A sad thing to realize, but an important thing.
On the plus side, there were yet a far greater number of people who were tremendously pleased for me and supportive of my first book. Friends I hadn’t seen in years contacted me to offer sincere congratulations, and new people I met through my writing groups, blogs, etc., were equally enthusiastic and complimentary. I feel truly blessed by this. I’ve always thought that the media overhypes the evil of humankind, and now that the average person has his/her own way of communicating globally through the internet, I find that this is true ─ humanity is mostly good, not mostly bad. It’s a shame that we only get reports about the bad from our mainstream news sources. This was a terrific thing to discover.
I also understood from being ill, that my husband and children, to borrow a phrase from Sally Field, “really do like me”. My son slept at hospital with me the first night I was there, and my husband, whose idea of cooking is to make a sandwich, delivered hot, homemade meals to my bedside every night once I got home. And then there were my friends who rallied ─ Thanksgiving dinner, two Christmas dinners, flowers, get well cards, and phone calls. Messages on Facebook and emails from my colleagues, new friends and former pupils, (who feel like nieces and nephews to me) all meant so, so much.
I’ve always valued my friends and my family, but I admit it was wonderful seeing the tangible proof that they value me, too. It was one more reason to get well, so that I could appreciate and enjoy them all the more.
But the biggest lesson I learned is from now on, with no worries about how others will feel, I’m going to embrace my impatience, rather than try to change it. It’s full speed ahead for me, now and always, because I’m made that way. And never again will I not trust myself. Never again will I feel intimidated by others’ opinions, be they valid or not. And when I find myself wavering from this resolution, I’m going to remember the bruises on my arms from IV needles, the feeling weak and dizzy, the crying as the questions ran around in my head as to why I wasn’t recovering, and all the other momentous experiences of this illness now burned in my memory. They all happened because I still haven’t completely shaken the “Good-Girls-Don’t-Make-a-Fuss Syndrome.” Screw that. From now on, I AM MAKING A FUSS. And it will be your choice to like me for it or not, however you please.
I challenge everyone reading this to do the same. If we do one thing differently this year, let’s embrace ourselves, even with all our faults. I don’t mean ‘be a sociopath and proud’. I mean that while not deliberately causing harm to others, let’s acknowledge that we will make mistakes, that we are not perfect, but we are still worthwhile human beings who have something to offer our friends, our family, and the world. Let’s acknowledge that we can and should have faith in our own selves, even with those imperfections. If we start with that attitude, the year ahead will open us to new encounters. Since we’ll feel more confident, we won’t be afraid when one of our beliefs is challenged, because if we learn that that belief is wrong, it will make us feel empowered, not weakened. We’ll have the courage to fail, not feeling that we are “failures”, but rather human beings on a journey to ever-increasing knowledge. And while none of this will necessarily make the year ahead be filled with all the health, happiness and success we all wish each other every January 1, it will certainly help it be filled with less anxiety and self-doubt.
So, look out 2010 ─ here we come!
How scary! I’m so glad you’re recovering. What a lesson you learned there. Keep being aware of what’s going on with yourself. Ok, it’s something we should all do. Thanks for the reminder. I hope 2010 is a great year for you!
Thanks, Cap! I hope 2010 is a great year for you, too! Maybe a promotion from “Cap” to “Admiral’? ; D
Haha! Ask the pirates! Arrrrr!
Patricia — I still have not met you personally but began feeling a kinship with you just a few months ago. Once I read your book, I felt as if I had known you for years. It took courage to write openly about your life the way you have, and I admire that tremendously.
As for the ‘good little girl’ syndrome, it is one for which we ladies (especially of Mediterranean parentage with domineering fathers) must be ever vigilant. Not wanting to complain, inconvenience those around us or just deny that our bodies are setting off alarms is dangerous territory. I nearly died in 1995 because my ex-husband did not consider my passing out on a Sunday morning to be a reason to call 911, nor did I. Instead, we waited until the local urgent care center opened at 10 am to see a doctor. By then I had passed out three more times. By the time I was admitted to the emergency room at the hospital just ACROSS THE STREET from the urgent care center, I had lost a huge amount of blood internally. It was determined to be an ectopic pregnancy. The paramedics could find no veins to tap to insert the IV, so they tapped my jugular and then the doctors saved my life.
Ever since then, some 15 years ago, I do not hesitate to listen to my body when it’s trying to tell me something is wrong. Not wishing to put a burden on others by insisting that you are fine and whatever it is will pass is really doing everyone a disservice — especially those you love.
I wish you a speedy recovery and hope to see your posts on Facebook with more frequency soon. Thank you for your desire to educate others as to how to take charge of their own health. The photo of you and your son is lovely.
Dear Dena,
Well hopefully we will meet on the 23rd at Sacramento State when I speak at CCYW.
You and I have shared some very similar experiences, haven’t we? I have to say, though, I don’t think it’s just Mediterraneans who don’t want to ‘make a fuss.’ One of my closest friends is English and she takes “don’t make a fuss” to an art level. But what you said about doing everyone a disservice especially those we love is very wise.
Thank you for the compliment on the photo. I loved that evening. It was at Litquakes’s San Francisco Black and White Ball and my son escorted me. ( I wanted to end this tirade on a positive memory of 2009. )
Oh my god!!!!! I have tears in my eyes reading this!!!!!!!!!! Are you feeling a bit stronger??? Are you going to be ok?? What do the doctors say?? Are you home?? Hugs and kisses from all the Vella’s!!
: ) Just sent you a message….
Patricia,
I am so grateful to read of what happened and what you’ve learned. Thank you for sharing it with us. I am astonished that your doctor let it get to such a dangerous level and, as you say, ultimately we each have to trust our own intuition. I’m glad you’re back!
Cathy
Thank you, Cathy. Looking forward to your new book coming out in the New Year!
OMG, Patricia, I had no idea! I’m so glad you made it through all that and it sounds like you are recovering well. As for the “good little girl” syndrome, I’m fortunate that my mother taught me to be very much opposite of that, but my mother-in-law I think could really relate. Even my husband has a hard time questioning a doctor’s opinion.
While there is a time and place for patience and deferring to those with greater experience and education than our own on a particular matter, our health is definitely not that place. I have always argued for the perspective that you know your own body better than anyone else, and if you think something is off, you need to push the issue until there is either a resolution, or sufficient evidence to the contrary, and an explanation for why you feel that something is off. We definitely need to be our own advocates when it comes to our health, our bodies.
Congratulations on making it through this horrible experience. It sounds like you are one tough cookie! I hope you continue to feel better!
Thank you for this note, Jaimie! You are very wise!
I’m so glad you made it through this! I’ve also put myself at risk by not being sufficiently forceful with docs. So many of us fear being disliked; perhaps that’s of social value when applied to driving well or not screaming fire when there is none, but it can have deadly consequences too. Wishing you a very healthy 2010.
Very true words, Phantom! Wishing you a very healthy (and happy) New Year, too!
Words can not describe how relieved I am that you are getting well again. I’m finding it difficult to be positive about the lack of cognizance on the part of the doc. Great docs have a gut sense too Patricia. And many of them know it is better to be safe than sorry.
In any case, I love that now it is your words that are flowing.
Peace, harmony and added strength in this new year.
Love, Michelle.
Thank you, Michelle. It’s always nice to hear from you and I hope things are going to be extraordinary for you in 2010. I know you’re right about the doc, but I happen to know he has a good heart. Suing him would accomplish nothing. Perhaps this will help him be more astute in future.
Continue to grace the world with your talents and kindness.
I would like – put simply – to take your idiot doctor out behind his office and beat him half to death with a rock. A little blood loss might just serve as a cluesticking that “MD” doesn’t stand for “Me, Deity.”
I’ll share something with you: in 1997, I had a PAP test. It came back normal. Two days later, sleepless and just listening to the warning bells in my head going off 24/7, I rang my gyne and told her the test was off, because something was wrong. She asked what my symptoms were, and I said, there are none. There is me, listening to a body that’s warned me when it was broken from the time I had polio as a kid. It’s warning me now, so I want you to look again. Something is wrong.
She did. The result – after the muttered “#@^$^$ Where in hell did THAT come from?!?”, which is not something you ever want to hear from someone whose head is between your legs – was less than ten days between the visit and the cancer surgery. Stage one, caught on the verge of jumping. The alarm bells were loud and fierce and I don’t ignore that, ever.
I’ve never bought into the “good girls stay quiet”. I’ve never believed some doctor knows what’s going on better than I do – I live in this body, and the doctor doesn’t.
And manoman, am I glad that you made it, and that you aren’t planning on letting a doctor or anyone else talk you out of what you think is happening to your own body, any time soon.
Yep. It was a lesson well-learned. Some of us are a little more thicker-headed than others. In my case, make that waaaay thicker.
One great thing that came out of all of this was getting to know you a bit better. You’re one hell of a person. I hope this new year brings you all the happiness, health and success you deserve.
Patricia,
HUGS.
I am glad to have met you and to have befriended you.
Six units of blood? That is a lot of blood.
My job is as a Clinical Laboratory Scientist, so part of my job is to crossmatch blood for transfusions.
I know that docs sometimes do not have the time to answer all the questions that their patients have for them about some of the technical aspects of treatment, etc. I am willing to answer any question you have about laboratory medicine, transfusions, etc. I’m not a doctor, but I will try my best to break things down so that you don’t have to have a degree in biology to understand how things work.
Take it easy my friend, and BE WELL.
Good to know, Ms. McCabe. (In case there is a next time, which I surely hope NOT) : )
It was great getting to know you, too. And I wish you a very happy, successful New Year!
Hi Patricia,
Wow on your story. And yeah on Doctors in general. It’s not that doctors are particularly worse than other humans, it’s just that 95% of humans are incompetent lemurs. They might (and I say MIGHT) be “good” lemurs….but they are still a bunch of incompetent drunken ones. And giving surgical tools to a drunken lemur is never a good idea. So that’s my summing up of the whole experience.
Just for the record also…being impatient is a clear sign of INTELLIGENCE. Since I am a small child I have been told repeatedly by evryone that I am not patient, to be more patient etc etc. even then as a small child, I begun to reply that “Patience is NOT a virtue”. I would stop there to goad them into arguing with that statement just so I could reply with “Patience is an excuse for the witless!! because only an IDIOT will wait to get something he can get NOW!!”
As you can guess I was never a very “popular” kid at school, but I sailed through it none the less. (The exams were designed for lemurs after all and the library had some decent books on how to build lasers…)
Glad you came out well from all this and I wish you a speedy recovery in 2010 and remember…the only good lemur is a deep fried one. Set your zap gun on deep-fry…our Martian Dawn is coming!
Dear G:
one of the best thing that came out of this experience was your response to it. It was so much fun reading this. And I will remember your sage words about patience being for the witless (or drunken lemurs) : )
Glad to see you back on the blogosphere…now i need a quick way to find your updates on my inbox…
Hi G,
You can get email updates of this blog by clicking the ‘Subscribe by Email’ link at the top right 🙂
Wow! I had uterine fibroid surgery in 1992. It went extremely well. Before then I was really sick and really, really anemic. I’m so sorry to hear this happened to you. Please don’t come down on yourself too hard. No one is perfect.
My mother almost died last year. My dad gave her mouth-to-mouth and brought her back to consciousness. I take that as a gift, to appreciate what we have, particularly when you come to close to losing it. It’s sobering. But it’s also a gift. Cherish it!
Hey Margy,
You know- you made an interesting point. I was slightly anemic even before the botched surgery, and I wonder now that the fibroid is gone if that won’t improve.
Thank you for your kind words of support on my character. And believe me- there were lots of wonderful things that came from this- including the lovely messages here.
: )
Hi Patricia,
Jesus you nearly took me with you when I read this post!
I am so happy you are still with us – god knows we need the good to survive and you are most certainly one of those.
I won’t waffle on apart from to say a couple of things:
1. You are dead right about being true to yourself. It is really easy to doubt, prevaricate and generally mess up our lives by doing the “right thing” when our guts scream out that they are the wrong thing.
I have had a terrible year with making decisions based on consensus rather than instinct. No more. From now on I deal with my own mistakes – right or wrong- safe in the knowledge that I can’t blame anyone more than I blame myself if its wrong. I hope you do the same.
We are indeed masters of our own destiny.
2. So what if people hate you? To be truly special you have to upset the imbeciles and ignorant. You carry on. Otherwise we are all turning into the Taliban. Excellence is rare and often dignified by the criticism of the banal.
3. I come from a family of doctors and believe me (I know you already do) they are as fallible as anyone. they just can’t be seen to admit it or the myth with collapse and we will all start questioning. Its a bit like being the pope with a diploma. Medical infallibility, just like political, religious or even comedic is a chimera that we all subscribe to until we are actually faced with the results. That’s when we realise how we have been duped.
I advise a lot of love, a lot of steak and a healthy dose of sang froid. Oh, and a bit of horizontal time with the old man is not a bad idea if you are feeling a little neglected!
I hope 2010 turns out to be the start of a new era for you and yours.
Isn’t it time Oprah was replaced by someone who really has a story to tell like you.
Happy New Year
Euge
There are so many wise statements in this comment I don’t know where to start. But I promise to remember what you’ve written. I’d also like to know since we’ve both been so busy lately (when you have time to send me a private message) what this means:
“I have had a terrible year with making decisions based on consensus rather than instinct”.
I agree about the steak and the horizontal time. Poor, poor hubs is delivering the steaks but, as to the rest, he was so traumatised by my near demise,he’s still treating me like spun glass. I plan to remedy that VERY soon! ; )
I hope whatever caused you distress this pat year is gone forever starting in 2010 and I wish you tons of very well-deserved success!
I’m in your corner!
Thanks, Lynn. Ditto!
Speaking of friends who only show up during bad times…LOL!
Seriously though, I was a big fan of your Vox website but this is the first time I’ve been able to find you on a non-Facebook or author website page. So glad you posted the WordPress link.
My sympathies for your very trying exprerience. I’ve now had 3 friends go through fibroid surgery and uterine issues. It’s risky and miserable. The good news is that all 3 women are doing great and I’m sure you’ll be doing well soon also.
I think western medicine is still stuck in some old, bad habits. Many doctors are lazy and God forbid one is a woman or getting older. I did find, though, with some research, I was able to find a GP and an OBGYN who took my health very seriously and did extensive research whenever necessary, and they listened to me. Worth having.
Many prayers and good thoughts to you, may you heal as fast as possible.
xoxo
Hi Ellie,
Nice to see you here! The VOX problem has not been resolved, so it looks like my dual postings are here to stay. I heard Jack Yan went to battle with VOX , since he is having many of the same issues with their software.
Anyway- about doctors, and older women- SO true! I need to do more research in future when it comes to finding good ones. Like teachers, priests, etc., good ones ARE out there.
Have a wonderful New Year!
(And thank you for your thoughtful and kind words.)
Great, now I have to celebrate my birthday knowing it was nearly your death day.
I am very relieved to hear that the worst is over and that you are on your way back to good health. Our bodies do have a way of telling us that things are wrong and we definitely should be listening to those little voices in our heads. Not the ones that tell us to kill people, but the ones that tell us something is wrong. Hoping for a speedy recovery… Your friend, Kz.
No, no, Kzinti!
Think of your birthday and the day my life was SAVED! because essentially, that is what happened on that day.
The world is a better place with you in it for many reasons and that might just be another (at least from my perspective) ; D
Okay, I will listen to the voices in my head from now on, though I don’t suppose that would be a therapist’s advice. Nonetheless, perhaps that’s what we ALL should be doing.
Happy New Year to you. Hope it’s a great one!
Gees, that was sure a scary time for you. I’m so glad you are doing well now and hope for continued good health.
I so agree with you about being the “good girl” and not complaining. I had a similar issue last spring and was diagnoised as being depressed. I followed the docs advice and took the pills and kept feeling worse. Then I had to take more pills, pills to sleep, pills for my upset stomach, pills for the itching. Finally I just stopped taking the depression med and still felt them same. I went to my doc and said there is something very wrong here, I’m so tired, I can’t sleep, I itch all over, I’m dizzy and have motion sickness for the first time in my life.
Doc ordered some blood work and found that I was so anemic that I needed to units of blood! I wasn’t depressed I was anemic. I didn’t take the blood transfusion and just took iron pills and eat everything I could find that had iron in it. In a week my iron levels were better so doc agreeded that I didn’t need the transfusions. My last blood work in Sept came back normal.
I’m not sure what caused the anemia, I think it was stress and the fact the I’m alergic to citric acid and sorbic acid and had limited my access to vitamin C. You need C to help absorbe the iron.
Anyway if I hadn’t insisted that the doc look further and refrused to take any more meds, I probably would have gotten worse and worse. I so agree that we need to stand up for ourselves and push the docs to listen to us. I’m lucky as my doc does listen and did find the correct diagnosis.
I’m not sure why you can’t have folks post to your VOX blog…I’m not having any issues.
Wow, Maureen! This is some story! Good for you taking such charge of things. A very proactive approach, and I hope others read this and learn a lesson from it.
The VOX issues have been going on for quite some time. I don’t know if you know Jack Yan ( in my VOX neighbourhood) but he is also having the same problems. He keeps contacting VOX to see if they can be solved, but I have essentially given up. Here’s what happens to me: If I stay signed in to VOX and someone comments on my post, I cannot even see the comment, nor do I get an email informing me I have a comment. The only way I can see comments on my posts is if I am signed out. However, the only way I can respond to comments is to click reply, then sign out, type in my response, and then sign back in to post them. On a blog like mine where I get lots of comments, this is a tedious and time-consuming process. It’s some kind of glitch. I also have problems with font size and I like the font larger so people can read it easily. I also have trouble very often leaving comments on other people’s blogs. These are all frustrating to say the least, and in the end I decided the best way to keep in touch with my VOX neighbours was to dual post there and here, so that if anyone wanted to leave me a comment, they can do so here,where I can at least do them the courtesy of a reply.
Happy New Year to you, dear!
Good to hear you are on the mend.
B
Thank you very much, indeed, BC! Happy, healthy, successful New Year to you!
Doctors? Oh, well, I guess we know about THEM. And here’s yet another reason to doubt, question, cross-examine and GET A SECOND OPINION!
Not that I did, in a similar instance. Like you, very polite and well-brought up. But things like this make us tough, bring out the shrew in us, for our betterment.
I’m moved by your terrible ordeal, hope you’ll be back to full strength again soon. We need to hear from women like you, to honor you, rejoice for you.
All best wishes for this brand new year, Patricia. Your slowing down time during your recovery will undoubtedly result in a new book, which we all await with huge anticipation.
Fran, you are so right. Women need to inform each other more about health issues. It’s helpful to know others have been through similar experiences.
On a second note, your comments about my writing are very much appreciated, in particular at this time, because they give me more reason to rally past this. Bless you for them!
Have a very happy, healthy, and successful New Year!
Patricia you must have protecting angel watching over you,ironically it doesn’t surprise me,2 years ago they marked the wrong foot to be cut on and I was telling the nurse in the surgery room how inept the nurses are and she said is that the right foot and I said see,there trying to kill me,then she believed me and told the manager of the hospital,I even moved to a different floor. When you go into a hospital your there on your own,don’t trust the doctors ever,trust your feelings. I know your very nice but the doctors almost killed you and your saying its mostly your fault,no its all there fault. Who really knows how many days that took off your life,if any,it doesn’t matter. They paid for my surgery and gave me 100,000 dollars,you should demand at least the same. They barely at the last minute saved your life,what does that tell you about the quality of your operation,the doctors will all say all is fine,listen to that voice in your head and get mad,they messed up your operation and almost killed you. Im sorry to be so blunt Patricia but it angers me more than you will ever know,be smart and get a lawyer.
Hello there, Craig,
Happy New Year to you!
That’s some experience you also went through. I hear what you’re saying about doctors and their incompetence and I so agree. However, I don’t think a lawsuit is called for in this particular case. Thank you for thinking of me and for caring so much about my well-being.
I hope you have a wonderful New Year! Any interesting projects in the works?
Patricia…I am so very sorry you had to go through this! I send you love and good wishes, beautiful woman…
Kay
Thank you, Kay. I was just listening to your CD yesterday. Your lovely voice went a long way towards helping me get well! : )
Hi Patricia, I left you a message on the Facebook page but I’ve no idea whether it went up or not because the damned hard drive died again as I was sending it, so I’m leaving one here too! So sorry to hear about what happened, that’s an awful way to end the year. I’ve also been inflicted with the ‘don’t make a fuss’ mentality but that’s mainly because I can’t be doing with people flapping round me. I hope you’re on the mend now, don’t go trying to do too much too soon though, take your time and let the lovely men in your life take up the slack for a wee while, I’m sure they won’t mind. And I’m sure that those who count will still think you’re fabulous whether you make a fuss or not!! Don’t worry about losing some hair, from your photos it looks like you’ve got a very thick, very abundant crop, you can afford to lose a fair amount before it actually becomes noticable. I hope 2010 is a great year for you and the rest of the family, take some time out of it to put yourself first, it’ll do you good! Take care, love Vik xxxx
Thanks for all the good advice, Vik!
As for my hair…the wig fools everyone!
(Joking. As you can tell, I’m on the mend) ; D
How frightening! Thank goodness you are okay. Take good care of yourself. We need you around! Hugs and best wishes for 2010.
Thank you my dear, for your message! Best wishes to you, too for this new year. I hope it’s a super one for you!
Hello Patricia! I just went digging around to catch up on what you have been up to and came upon this… HONEY… don’t ever scare us like that again… Okay?!! Seriously. My heart was just a hammering reading this. PLEASE follow those perfect instincts next time. Women’s intuition is a strong and powerful thing. NOT. TO. BE. IGNORED. EVER!
That being said… I am sooooo glad you are doing better and still with the rest of us living souls. I’d love to catch up more later when you have time and feel up to it. You have been on my mind.
Please take care!!
You have been on my mind, also. It seems you are very busy and productive. I’m wishing you the best in this new year- health, happiness and success!
Wow — I just got back from our own three week trip to the East Coast (which was to visit Susan’s folks for Christmas) and that included the sudden passing (stroke) of Susan’s father.
Having worked for nearly a decade in reproductive endocrinology, I know more about UF and endometriosis than I ever thought I would. I’m glad that a catastrophe was averted — and after having taught many many pre-med students all I can say is that as a patient you have to be your own best advocate. Question question question! Too many people are intimidated by “white coat syndrome”. Thank God you were okay.
Here’s to a great year in 2010!
All the best,
Steve
Hi Steve,
Thank you for this wise advice. As I still struggle with residual health issues – i.e- I have a cough from hospital that will NOT go away and is turning into bronchitis, something I haven’t had in years- I am getting angrier and angrier at the doctor’s cavalier disregard for what I was telling him.
I’m sorry to hear about Susan’s father. It’s very hard o lose a parent, no matter how old we get, and the during holidays makes it even more sickening. My sincerest condolences.
Oh my goodness, what an ordeal! My prayers are with you, Patricia.
I plain gave up on Vox, incidentally, though I checked in there today to see if you had posted. Well, you certainly had—and had gone through something so very serious. I hope 2010 is a lot smoother for you!
Thank you, Jack. I was just mentioning your dilemma with VOX to someone who posted a comment here. I’m sorry to hear you’ve given up, too. They are losing some great content by not addressing these issues, but you and I seem to have exacerbated problem cases compared to what others have told me. I’ve essentailly given up on VOX, only post there so as not to snub my longtime neighbours. But I can’t accept comments there,and sometimes, I can’t post comments on others’ blogs, either. (sigh) We’ll keep in touch via Facebook.
It seems to be the best way, Patricia. Like you, I set up a WordPress blog, too (jackyan.com/blog)—it looks like my old blog (which was run off Blogger) but the back-end is all WordPress now.
Someone commented on my last (Vox) post saying that it wasn’t technically that hard to create a site like Vox (maintenance and hosting are the real biggies), so they should have been able to pinpoint the problem.
I think they will continue losing users, apart from the sploggers who are really overrunning things there. I’m sure they are part of the problem, and Six Apart needs to tighten up its security.
More importantly, I hope you are better now!
Thank you, Jack. I will have a look at your new blog site. It’s a shame about VOX, but sloppy organizations seem to be the problem of the decade….