Ancient Olympia by RobW on Flickr Perhaps one of the ‘conspiracy theories’ is right. You might be a “domestic terrorist” seeking to overthrow the government by creating chaos, as the officials, like officials everywhere, every time there’s a disaster anywhere, ‘chicken-little it’, shouting, “the sky is falling…but it’s not my fault!” You might be a landowner who got screwed by one of the capricious government edicts, that says you can construct a home one day and then declares your building site a ‘forest-protected area’ the next. You might even be a cold-blooded opportunist, who expects you can now purchase ruined land on the cheap and … [Read more...]
A Dark and Handsome Italian
The writings of two of my fellow bloggers prompted me to resurrect this poem I wrote, “A Dark and Handsome Italian,” which was published sometime in the 1990’s in New Press Magazine. Foxsydee often writes fun, light-hearted posts, which I thoroughly enjoy. This poem, I hope, is fun and light-hearted (and very tongue-in-cheek.) Lezlee has been posting writings about her recent trip to Italy, one of my favourite countries and the place from where my family originates. So, ladies… this is for you both, with my thanks for blogging. Oh- one more thing - the ‘dark and handsome Italian’ in the photo, is played by one of my sons, who’ll probably disown me for posting his photograph , especially in … [Read more...]
Some Things I Wish I Knew When I Was Eighteen
Patricis Pondering 1. The football quarterback you sighed over all through high school English class, will usually be the first guy to go bald, get fat and have a bypass. You won’t recognize him at your tenth-year high school reunion. 2. Generally speaking, teachers, doctors, clergy and police officers are no smarter, no more compassionate, trustworthy nor dedicated to their work, than the rest of the population. Sometimes they’re even less so. 3. You should judge who your true friends are not only by the sympathy they express when something very bad happens to you, but by the genuine joy they express when something very good happens to you. 4. The Captain and Tenille were wrong. … [Read more...]
The Emperor Has New Clothes
It’s never been proven that Barry Bonds takes steroids.” That’s a statement I hear a lot in the San Francisco Bay Area and it brings to mind another statement I heard a lot a few years back: “There are weapons of mass destruction in Iraq.” The connection between these two statements is this: depending on whether they were for Bonds or Bush, people rebutted them both with this declaration: “All evidence points to the contrary!” We can all be so clear sighted, can’t we? As long as we’re talking about ‘the other team.’ But if he’s one of ‘us,’ we’re capable of ignoring facts that are as obvious as an elephant on a bus. We don’t accept “reasonable doubt” when it’s not convenient for ‘us.’ … [Read more...]
Poker Part II : Nurses, Pimps, Prams and Rita
'Poker Pete,' Patricia and Rita Rudner So I flew to Las Vegas to be with “Poker Pete” for the last few days of the WSOP. Las Vegas is a perfect spot for an ‘A’ type personality like myself to go on a short holiday. There is nothing else to do except relax and have fun. After all the work the past mon The first day, I hung out by the pool and just soaked up the sun. I had one of those frozen drinks that they stick a fresh strawberry in, so that you can let yourself be deluded into thinking that you’re only having fruit. But I didn’t let myself worry about the calories, or how much it cost (twelve dollars for a tiny little cup, which is ridiculous) because I was on holiday. I also … [Read more...]
Poker Star
Tn-PokerStars-Holdem I listen to Pete (my husband) talk about poker the same way he listens to me talk about Harry Potter. I have no clue why its so important to him, I just know it is. Very, very important. Therefore, just like he sits there and nods his head, making sure he keeps eye contact with me, so’s I don’t catch on to how bored he is when I say things like, “Dementors,” “Dumbledore” and “Diggory,” I return the courtesy when he repeats certain phrases endlessly, such as “down the river,” “on the button,” “the flop,” “bad beats” and my personal favourite, which I even put in my new book, giving hubs credit for the quote, “Because in poker, sometimes stupid wins.” So far, only … [Read more...]
A ‘Shout Out’ to Selma Williams
Patricia Smuggling C4 in Her Hairclip I didn’t blog last week because I was in New York, attending a writers’ conference, catching up with some old colleagues and meeting my new agent. All in all, I should say it was a great week. And it was…although it didn’t start out that way. And that was because I didn’t have a one-quart-sized plastic baggie when I arrived at the security check-in at San Francisco Airport. Note to anyone who hasn’t travelled in an airplane recently: All toiletries must not only be in containers no more than THREE ounces, they should also be secured in a ONE-quart-size plastic baggie. You know, like the … [Read more...]
Darfur
China Please One of the positive things middle-age has brought me, is a keen desire to stay healthy and to consciously go about expediting that goal. And so I do stuff that I never did when I was in my twenties---like going to the dentist and subjecting myself to regular teeth cleanings, which to me, will always feel like someone’s trying to gouge out my heart through my gum line. I won’t even discuss the mammograms and the ‘gyno’ visits, except to say that as bad as they are, they’re still not as bad as the teeth cleaning, because they don’t need to be scheduled every three months. And then, there’s the gym. I go to the gym five-six days per week. Like every other … [Read more...]
On GUILT
In “My Very First Blog” I touched briefly on the subject of guilt and I got an interesting response from one of my readers---”Disgruntled” by name, who left the comment, “Oh, boo hoo---you felt guilty.” Not to be sexist, but I just have a hunch “Disgruntled” is a man and if I’m right, more likely he’s a man over the age of forty. The reason I think this, is that the male of the species does not feel guilt unless he’s six years old. Before that he’s too busy drinking breast milk, being proud of his potty training successes, feeling in charge of his parents and environment, learning his alphabet and emulating the Ninja Turtles (or their 2007 equivalent,) to feel any … [Read more...]
My Very First Blog
I just realized today that it is approximately five years since I returned to the US after having lived in Greece for more than seven years. Gosh, these five years have just zipped by. When the weather warms up like it has, I still miss sitting by the Greek sea, sipping retsina with my friends and eating a feta cheese and tomato salad. I keep saying I will get back there one of these days, but so far, I haven’t done it. At least I can still keep up with my people there via email and cheap internet phone and every once in a while one pops in to send a kid to college here or sell the old property that belonged to the family, or what have you. So it’s not like we’ve lost touch. Still, so much … [Read more...]