INTEROFFICE COMMUNICATION FROM: Satan TO: Minions RE: The United States of America, Planet Earth It looks like we’re finally making some real progress in the United States of America. Naturally, as your Supreme Leader, I take credit for the brilliant idea. But it was our diligent force of minions working tirelessly there, who carried out My plan so well. Indeed, using the Christians against themselves, without even one of them suspecting our ultimate goal, was a group effort of pure genius. So, I’m going to extend cautious congratulations to My force of followers who are working there. You’ve done an excellent job - on the one hand you’ve calmed the … [Read more...]
The Sanctity of Marriage and The Colour Purple
In the fifty-two years I've been on the planet, I've experienced great joys in my life. But I've also experienced many great tragedies. Only those who are closest to me know of them, and will ever know what they cost me. Yet, as much as I've suffered because of those tragedies, I'm glad of them in many ways, because not only did they make me stronger, they made me more compassionate. Having been judged and condemned, and hurt by the unfairness of it, I really try as hard as I can to walk in the shoes of others before I condemn or judge myself. Yet, when I do come to the point where I feel no amount of compassion can help me excuse the acts of one human being against another, I become so … [Read more...]
All About Foxsy
Today, I dedicate my blog to a friend and a blogging 'neighbour', Foxsy. Foxsy5 More than a year ago she showed up on my blog all pretty, pink and well...foxy, and left me a thought-provoking and life-affirming comment. I noticed her everywhere in my neighbourhood, and whether smart, funny, or passionate, her comments always made me smile. They showed clearly that she was a dynamic woman who loved her life her family, her friends, and her husband. She always made us feel good. She was beautiful on the outside as well as the inside, and she made us feel beautiful, too. And now it's our turn to return the favour. Listen, Foxsy girl- life just handed you a tough blow. Foxsy6 … [Read more...]
An Alternative Universe* (Satire)
I’ve been away from my blog for more than two weeks because I was in an alternate universe. No, really. I got there by spaceship. I wish you could have been there. It was very intriguing. Because in the alternate universe I visited, Barack and Michelle Obama had white skin and John McCain and Sarah Palin, along with their spouses, had black skin. My goodness, you should have seen the change in perception by the alternate universe American people. Instead of saying that Obama’s name was “too radical and Muslim,” the newspapers, TV and radio announcers in the alternate universe praised his name for its spiritual meaning, which is “Blessed.” They marveled at the determination and hard work … [Read more...]
An Announcement from Patricia’s Publicists
Harlot's Sauce Book Cover Dear Blogging Pals of Patricia Volonakis Davis: My name is Margot Van Riper and I am Patricia Volonakis Davis' author liasion. I'm taking over Patricia's blog space today to announce with great pleasure the publication of her book, Harlot's Sauce: A Memoir of Food, Family, Love, Loss and Greece. If you are a fan of Patricia's blog, we thought you might be tickled to know about this publication and that Patricia has acknowledged her VOX neighbors and writers on Harlots' Sauce Radio e-magazine in her book's dedication page. If you would like any more details about this memoir, or updates on Patricia's work, please visit her new interactive website. … [Read more...]
Why Do You Have So Many Kids?
Sons 1 Uber-Liberals can be just as off-putting as uber-Conservatives. I’m not talking about the type of Liberals who look at you with disappointment as you discreetly try to eat your cheeseburger, while they’ve ordered the veggie platter. I’m talking about the kind of uber-Liberals who, after you’ve invited them to dinner, respecting their beliefs enough to serve them up 'Tofu Surprise,' they still look at you as though you’ve handed them nuclear waste to consume because you heated their food in a ─ gasp! ─ ‘energy-bleeding, cancer-causing’ microwave. I’m talking about the kind of Liberal who wanted to hang Michael Vick publicly by his…well, rhymes with ‘Vick’, and cut out … [Read more...]
Declaring Myself
As I roam around various blogs, I notice that though I don’t know many of my blogging friends' real first and last names, I do know that they are “Christian” or “Atheist,” “Conservative” or "Liberal.” It seems important to many that others know what bunch they’re part of, and certainly that they are part of a bunch---any bunch. It’s also important to many to know which bunch others are a part of, because in this way they can gauge that other person based on whatever that other person's particular bunch signifies to them. For example, if someone states, “Hi, my name is Such-and-Such, and I’m a Christian,” or, “Hi, my name is So-and-So, and I’m a Liberal,” there’s bound to be someone … [Read more...]
Thank Heaven for X and Y (I Don’t Mean the Chromosomes)
Hoboken-generation-y It’s good to be back. My garden, after weeks of neglect, is once again blooming. Having a garden is just like having a life. You have to attend to it every so often, pull out the weeds, expose it to more sunshine and nourishment where needed, in order for it to flourish. I also had a remarkable visit around my growing blog neighbourhood. It was impossible to leave comments everywhere, but I so enjoyed reading about everyone’s activities, seeing all the photos and artwork, hearing the music and musing over the poetry and stories. I’ve said it before ---what an extraordinary group of people, what a wealth of talent we have at our fingertips every day. It sure beats … [Read more...]
So Long for Now
Patricia in the Garden 2 My Dear Neighbours: It's time for me to take a short holiday from blogging. I want to spend a few weeks catching up with everyone in my neighbourhood whose blogs I haven't had time to read in the past few months, as I've been so busy with writing. I feel as though I've lost touch with many of my friends,and am missing very important things in their lives, not only here on VOX, but at home, too. Also, my garden is full of weeds and needs tending. I will be back in August. Before I go I want to thank all my neighbours who tagged me for the "Eight Things You Don't Know About Me" game. I didn't want to respond to only one person, so I decided this would be a good … [Read more...]
Anahata
Black tail deer fawn by fuzuoko on Flickr Sleepy Hollow, Northern California. “What a perfect place for a writer to live,” I thought, when I moved here almost five years ago. And I did get a lot of writing done, when I wasn’t in my garden, that is. Our house is surrounded by woods and high hills, with a seasonal creek dancing along the right edge of our property, lined by a sentinel of three giant rocks. “We’re butt up against nature here,” is what my husband likes to say. When I saw it, apart from thinking about the quaint name of the area and of its street names, like “Van Winkle Drive,” and “Ichabod Lane,” I also imagined that I could, at long last, have a garden. Having lived … [Read more...]
I am Ann Coulter
Today would have been the day I posted the last in my series on men, titled, “In Danger From The Outside World.” But, I’ve had to postpone because several events have occurred in the last two weeks that have prompted me to make this announcement: I am Ann Coulter. That’s right. She and I are the same person. Look - this chart (Chart I) will prove it: Patricia V. Davis Ann Coulter age 51 47 height 5 ft. 3 inches 6 ft. weight 124 unknown Hair colour dark brown blonde Eye colour black blue Education Teaching Degree Law Degree Residence California New York Self-defence Can leg press 270 pounds Owns guns, has body guards Though this chart does not show much … [Read more...]
In Danger From the Outside World* Part II
In Memory of Gregory Randall Davis May 9, 1983 - January 29, 2002 Greg What does it mean to go from being boy to man? As a former high school teacher and a mother of five sons and stepsons combined, I’ve witnessed many boys struggle with that question. Some figure it out, others never do and remain in a limbo - an ‘adult boy,’ stuck in a time warp of adolescence, where ethically, spiritually and intellectually, the centre of his universe will remain forever anthropocentric; where he will never figure out how to look beyond himself, what his role in society is and how he can make the world a better place just by his existence in it. In The United States of America, where I … [Read more...]
In Danger From the Outside World*
Part I of Three Parts on Boys and Men Our sons. When they’re born, we hold them in our arms, stroke them, soothe them and take them to our breasts. It’s the only time in their entire lives that they are permitted to be openly content in their helplessness, universally approved of in their total reliance on another human being and a female, at that. By the time they’re two, they’ve heard it at least once, even if it’s not their parents who say it: “Boys don’t cry.” GI Joe 1964 Little soldier by thats_verynice on Flickr Little soldiers If they haven’t absorbed that message by the time they’re seven, even the most nurturing, liberated parent … [Read more...]